salam...
lately, i find it hard to write. i post pictures to have entries. i wanna have entries. kalau boleh, i wanna write everyday. that's the initial purpose of having a blog. i love writing. babbling mostly, but yeah..writing is the formal word for it.
i embedded my memories here. i remembered, i wrote about how delicious my roti canai tasted. how terrible it is not to see anything in the lrt. pitam case. and also, how great it is to pick manggis at my mak long's huge kebun in muar.
i noticed, my entries are so sad nowadays. i wrote with tears. why? i'm still figuring out answers, to answer myself. why is this happening. holidays can't make me happy anymore. that's just so weird. having good companion and friends lasts at that moment of time. when they are not around, i felt empty.
books and also, my darling lumix aren't the best of friends as well.
things got worst, as if to sum things up, i discovered few bad things about myself that i didn't see it before.the new boss pointed things out for me. it IS good but i just can't describe, how humiliating it was. me, being the eldest, always wanted to be the best and do well in everything, have great achievements, is actually lost! there are no specific 'lane' i'm following. i'm everywhere. goodness...where actually am i?
i cried last nite, till i fall asleep peacefully. and this morning, as if the world is encouraging me to let my tears flow. it rained.
and i cried watching mai's pictures. i missed my nieces so bad.
and i cried listening to mirai - kiroro. i understand none of the lyrics.
and i cried for the simplest thing.
owh i am just terribly sad.
as i write this entry, i still got tears falling..
one of these days, i'm hoping Allah would show me some signs. please, Allah!..:"( how can cekya be so sad?
wassalam..
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