Tuesday, November 30, 2004

berbelak-belak....


"....perasaan bercampur baur. macam cuaca jugak. it can happen anytime, anywhere. without realising yang perasaan@cuaca itu would affect surroundings kita, especially people around us....."

Monday, November 29, 2004

~~'d' door~~

salam....

hari ni(pada ingatan cekya) is a birthday of a friend. once, he was the closest friend i've got. i told him every problems about me and him. well it turned out that i've got the wrong date, but the right age!hahaha...mixed up antara birthday & age dia. his day was 23rd and he turned 29 a week ago. then we started off by asking how each other are doing. according to me, i'm fine..hehe...but he was busy telling me how busy he is, with work, nak kahwin, how things have changed, his perspective of life. he was being patient all these while, handling life, bersyukur sangat - all of those things that you feel when you found the love of your life and having that person in your life, till the day you die. fine.

and he was telling me to pray, hope for the best, Allah will balas segala kesabaran kita, if you refer kat al-Quran, Allah ada sebut this and that - all those things that you said when you' re settling down, nothing else matters except for working out things to face the future with your hubby/wife, and you don't really need to hope to find someone to be with you, when there are no worries in mind whether you're going to get married or not, because you ARE getting married...in a month's time.fine.

i was a little irritated. no,no missy nice-lady today. boring pun ada tapi mengenangkan it's been a while since we contacted each other, and knowing that he's gonna get married, it was his birthday(which i'm still figuring out why did i care so much!), so i decided to ring him up and kept quiet till i got the space to mencelah. and there goes, segala laser-laser pun keluar, sampai terdiamlah cek abang tu.

it is very good to console other people. and i don't mean to deny whatever things that he said. apa yang dia cakap tu memang betul. and thru experience, he can say and advice me on what and how to do things. masalahnya, jalan cerita seseorang itu berlainan. dan usaha seseorang untuk dapat apa yang dia mahukan tu depends pada keizinan Allah Ta'ala. and if Allah does not permit you to do/have it, there goes. yang mampu kita lakukan hanyalah berdoa. redha.

degilkah cekya ni, seolah tak mahu menerima nasihat orang? i know, from his voice, he's kinda disappointed dengan penerimaan cekya. nak buat macam mana. dia dah jumpa dengan 'pintu' yang menghubungkan dia dengan kebahagiaan. dan cekya masih lagi terkial-kial dalam pencarian sendiri. secara mudahnya, cekya bagi contoh pada, katakan kita nak pergi rumah anuar zain(hahaha...contoh abg nuar la jugaaakkk). without peta. kita akan terus-terus mencari dan kalau kita jumpa, alhamdulillah dan insya-Allah, kita takkan ada masalah untuk pergi ke rumah anuar zain lagi. dan kita akan bagitahu semua yang kita dah jumpa rumah anuar zain. maka berbahagialah kita!

but, if it's destined that we are not suppose to find anuar zain's place,yet, then kita akan terus mencari, mencari dan terus mencari. nampaknya, we're not meant to meet anuar zain, not yet. sedih woo... abg nuar cumil.hahahah.... kita belum ditakdirkan untuk bertemu dengan 'pintu' yang menghubungkan kita dengan kebahagiaan tu..
maka teruslah kita menghadapi ujian Allah dalam pencarian tersebut. pada cekya, that's how we settle down. the destiny.

ermm...kalau ada yang merasakan terlalu sempit pemikiran cekya, harap maaf. ini kenyataan. kenyataan yang tidak dapat cekya sangkal.

wassalam.... s : hari ni, rasa macam nak tengok wayang lagi. huhuhuhuh....

hujung minggu...

salam...

FRIDAY
at last, cekya pergi juga ke tgv petang jumaat kelmarin. and the incredibles were simply incredible! memang lawak cerita tu. tak rugi rasanya, walaupun cekya pergi menonton seorang. next movie is of course, alexander!

anyways, cekya sampai tgv petang tu at about 545pm, pi collect tiket dan terus naik ke kinokuniya. dah lama rasanya tak ber'kino'..hehe... i bought myself a magazine and a story book(terima kasih kekasih - norhayati berahim : about a lady, enggaged and tunang dia buat hal, kuar dengan pompuan lain. hangin betul! some men! sorry la, emo sket ari ni!).

mood wasn't so good that day, so that's the implication. beli tanpa memikirkan budget. kalau cekya singgah parkson or isetan, i bet i'll be buying some shirt or anything like that. duh! balik tu pulak, i bought rotiboy. i'm just a weirdo. tak pernah-pernah beli rotiboy even if bau dia semerbak sampai dalam lrt!

SATURDAY
bangun lewat. don't ask me what time. hehehe....i was down with flu, plus my mood hasn't improve. dok lepak tengok tv. i refused when my mom asked me to join her for open house @ her ex-boss' place. balik tu, she bebel, coz terpaksa jawab pertanyaan orang like where was i?why didn't i come? hehehe..biasa la ma...orang glamour lagik cumil!hahaha....duh!

SUNDAY
bangun lewat lagi. tido pun lewat coz i was so into the book i bought. at about 9, my uncle called, saying that he's coming with his family. so my mom sibuk nak prepare lunch for them. berebutlah coz i have to leave at about 1pm. promised my officemates to pick them up kat lrt kg baru, then pi cheras for an open house. how i hate rushing and wearing baju kurung dalam peluh coz kena berebut. mencik betul. sudah la hujan. and the worst part was, masa kat area pusat bandar damansara, air naik sket and it washed over my front mirror. tak nampak apa-apa langsung kat depan. memang cekya panik sangat time tu, dengan hujan lebatnya lagi! eisk...

anyways, alhamdulillah sampai jugak ke kg baru. setitik pun tak hujan! eisk..! then cekya bertolak ke cheras. ada nasi dagang, sate...makan banyak mana?eisk..jangan ditanya!

ermm..masih ingat lagi kawan baik cekya - encik ahmad? dia dah resign dari company and he's working with his dad now. he's suppose to attend the open house tapi dia sampai lewat. he called and repeatedly asked me to stay and wait for him. cekya pulak kena rush balik pj sebab dah janji nak ke open house kat bandar sri damansara. gini la lebih kurang sms between us :

cekya : ala...ko lambat sangat la. aku nak balik dah ni. i need to go. i have promised a friend, nak pi open house dia.

ahmad : please, aku dah nak sampai. kat plaza phoenix nih. tunggu la kejap.

but everybody nak balik cepat including myself. and yang pelik, semua orang tamau jumpa encik ahmad. entah la. gaduh or berjauh hati, i just don't know. i'm stucked between friends. kiri kawan, kanan pun kawan. then, we left the place sebab dah tak larat nak tunggu. masa on the way back, encik ahmad sms-ed me;

ahmad : ko nie...you left 2 minutes before i arrived. i really wanted to see you..

alahai...sedih la pulak. rasa guilty sangat. cekya sms dia banyak kali. he won't answer. merajuk gamaknya. and i messaged him kat ym but with no reply. i'm sorry encik ahmad..:(

rasa bersalah tuh tak habis sampai sekarang.....

then, cekya sampai rumah pukul 530pm, my friend was waiting for me. kitorang pun terus ke bandar sri damansara. makan lagi. the food was lontong, mihun goreng and sambal ayam. pedas gila! bergelen rasanya cekya minum air. huhuhuhu...

itulah saja cerita-ceriti cekya last weekend. pada encik ahmad, mintak mahap la... i wished you would come over to my house, ajak ramona sekali yea..dan kepada cik perut, i am so sorry as i have abused you over the weekends. hari ni, terimalah hukumannya, asyik ulang alik ke toilet. heheheh....

daaa people!wassalam...!

Friday, November 26, 2004

...boring friday...

salam...

kalau friday, semua orang happy coz there'll be the weekends. but not for me. ntah la..tak tahu kenapa rasa tak berapa seronok. i'll be going to an friend's open house on sunday. hope that'll change my mood by looking forward to a nice get-together.

kat luar mendung. i hope it will not rain. Ya Allah...pleaseeeeee don't let the sky burst today. hehehe....i have plans this evening. i've booked a ticket to watch 'incredibles'. alone. nothing weird about cekya going to the movies alone. cuma dalam kepala sekarang ni, nak atau tak nak. THAT is the question!


been seeing this movie's promo since i watched 'berlari ke langit'. hilarious. i guess it's funnier than a shark's tale. tengoklah macam mana nanti. oops!it's 5:00pm. gotta make my move now. take care people, and have a pleasant weekend!

wassalam!

jika ini ketentuan-Nya!


"...dinda tetap bahagia,meskipun cuma hidup dengan harapan. jangan kanda turuti perintah ini. cinta kanda yang dinda harapkan. bukan dari yang lain. kanda tahu betapa hati dinda terasa damai kerna dapat bertemu kembali dengan kanda..." - gusti putri retno dumilah@puteri gunung ledang

bahagiakah kita cuma dengan harapan. mampukah kita mengecap bahagia itu? dulu, cekya pernah mengharap dan mungkin, di satu sudut hati ini, masih mengharap. mengharap akan apa yang telah berlaku hanyalah mimpi peneman tidur yang panjang. mengharap agar dikejutkan dari lena supaya cekya dapat mengecapi bahagia yang memang diharapkan. mengharap agar kehilangan 'dia' hanyalah suatu mimpi. mengharap agar keluarga yang dimiliki si 'dia' sekarang adalah cerita rekaan semata.

mana mungkin.

justeru menyusun harapan takkan mungkin ada dalam diri cekya lagi. untuk apa? sedang cekya tahu harapan itu tidak akan, bukan tidak pasti, tetapi tidak akan menjadi kenyataan yang diimpikan. pahit? tentunya. persis nescafe 'o' yang sedap berasap di atas meja cekya ni.

berbeza dengan gusti putri. cinta adalah harapannya. sekadar berjumpa, sudah mampu mendamaikan jiwa. sekadar bertentang mata dan berlawan madah, sudah cukup untuk membuatkan gusti putri bahagia untuk hidup dengan harapannya.

emosi cekya tak sekuat gusti putri. tak betah untuk hanya hidup dengan harapan yang muluk-muluk dan mengabaikan kenyataan yang memualkan di depan mata.

apa motifnya catatan ini? hanya peringatan buat cekya di masa hadapan. bahawa cekya telah menasihati diri untuk tidak menyulam harapan. agar tidak menyimpan angan. kerna jika cekya gagal menggapai harapan, maka bakal jatuh terhempas segala yang diinginkan.

bukankah segala itu pedih. dan dalam waktu ini, cekya tidak mampu berjudi hidup. kerna bukan mudah untuk menyenangkan hati semua, apatah lagi hati sendiri!

Thursday, November 25, 2004

pink power!hehehe...

Pink Vibes

Your Energy is Pink. You have achieved a perfect
balance between spiritual awareness and
material existence. You are usually
affectionate and warm, showing compassion and
love for others. Others find you genuine,
cooperative and friendly. You are a
humanitarian and you possess a deep
understanding of life. You may aspire to
philanthropy, or you may find yourself heading
or volunteering for agencies that create change
for the good of the whole. You are a leader
and are willing to take on much responsibility.

What color is your energy?
brought to you by Quizilla

cerita dulu...


tangisan dalam kerinduan - farah


****************************************************

dah a few days cekya cari lagu ni on net. alhamdulillah,adik cekya dah downloadkan malam semalam. the words are so amazing. memang sama yang macam cekya rasa for the past 3 years. cekya berharap, satu hari nanti, this uneasiness akan hilang untuk selama-lamanya. lemas rasanya...

semalam cekya mc. demam melarat pulak. jumpa doktor, he asked me why the heck that i go to the office on that day(tuesday)...alahai kena marah. so semalam,i was on bed half of the day. another half? dok masak, buat kerja rumah sikit-sikit...but still, baju yang sebakul tu tak berlipat. letih ah... rasa wear-off sangat. dengan hidung tangkap leleh lagik... eisk!

nanti cekya tulis lagi. i have loads of paper on my desk. i would say that 70% of 'em are rubbish. hehehe....cekya ni suka menyimpan. kalau duit, dah tentu kaya!hehehe...

daaa!wassalam...

p/s : ada orang tu suruh cekya makan racun rumpai basta 15 semalam untuk baikkan demam. sabo ajelah!!!

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

ding*dong*deng

salam....

well,well,well...

kerja banyak since cekya masuk office semalam. and to make things worst, i'm having fever and also flu. non-stop mengalir nih. tissue in my left hand and 100 plus on the other. begitu punya malas nak pi klinik. i might be getting an mc,pastu kena stay at home,rest,baring..etc...yang cukup melemaskan. lagi sakit, ada la...right guys? it's better if i go to work...

lunch time tadi, mamam nasi himpit, rendang kedah, rendang tok, rendang nenek...hehehe...best wooo...makan sambil bersila dalam department legal.huhuhu....we are all still in raya mood. i'm still waiting for my fever to recover. nak ganti puasa when my health allows me to. and speaking of raya mood, cekya nak bubuh a few pics i took masa raya kelmarin.


nampak tak yang macam pulut panggang tu? it's called pulut gugus. inti dia, bawang kecil, bawak puting, lengkuas & halia-blend then together. then, gaul dengan rempah beriani. tumis, and masukkan daging(yang mudah empuk). masak sampai daging hancur dan tercarik. tumis sampai kering macam serunding.

as for the pulut, beras pulut dikukus for 1/2 an hour. then, keluarkan dan gaul dengan santan. kukus again for another 1/2 an hour.

bila dah siap both bahan, ambil satu senduk or less pulut yang dah siap tu and leperkan on daun pisang yang dah disalai. bubuh the daging beriani yang dah masak tu on the pulut and roll it macam pulut panggang. balut dengan daun pisang and both hujung tu bolehlah di cucuk dengan kayu kecik macam tooth-pick tu. or kalau dah moden, staple aje.hehehe...bakar in the oven in about 5 minutes. sedap wooo...hehehe

and i also manage to snap the picture of the place i was born. hospital besar sultanah aminah.tepi laut tu...patut la pantang tengok laut, nak berendam jek!hahahaha....


bangunannya merah, patut la cekya suka kaler merah, kaler pink...hehehe...errr...kaler hospital boleh influence a new born's preferences in life ke?hahhaha...theory cekya la nih!;)

and masa cekya balik ke kl, somewhere near upm,bangi,ada sunset. i tried snapping a few tapi gambar tak cantik and below is the best shot that i manage to get. ada lagi dalam fotopage, do have a look eh?

rasanya, itu saja celoteh cekya buat hari ni. posting hari ni, ala-ala balas dendam sebab tak dapat nak update blog untuk sekian lama..hehehe..

take care darlings!

wassalam...


a long,long break!

assalamualaikum....

i felt like it's been weeks since i write anything here*memang dah 'weeks' pun*. memang ada niat nak tulis during raya tapi,last minute, ayah cekya kata balik KL on 5th raya coz he had to work,ada inspection kat some of the factories he visited monthly.sepatutnya 3rd raya. so tertundalah semua plan. and i didn't even get the chance to wish all of you a wonderful raya. rasanya belum terlambat, so here it goes;

SALAM AIDILFITRI TO ALL
&
Maaf Zahir Batin

cekya harap, everybody had lotsa fun during raya. jumpa sanak saudara. it was a wet raya in jb. payah nak ke mana-mana due to the heavy rains. somehow,we manage to jalan-jalan carik pasal on 1st & 2nd raya...and we spent the rest of the days, sleeping...heheheh...

dalam pada hujan tu,cekya amik banyak gambar masa raya tu. do visit my fotopage kalau teringin nak tengok kami beraya sekitar jb.hehehe...and i'll post some scenery pics later. so take care people, and pada yang bekerja, welcome back to the office!

wassalam...

Friday, November 05, 2004

semlm...

salam blog...

serasa macam dah lama cekya tak menulis-maklumlah,orang minat menulis...sehari tak menulis pun,cekya rasa lama sangat!

anyway,yesterday was filled with tears.'dia' dari masa lampau cekya,hadir semula.he has changed in many ways.agaknya sebab dah ada isteri dan anak,maka all his bad traits dah tak ada...alhamdulillah. tapi yang tak bestnya, segala memori datang semula. dan yang paling cekya sebak, 'dia' masih ingat mama,ayah dan adik-adik cekya. 'dia' minta cekya cari someone to be married to and have a family of my own. bukanlah semudah itu!

maka semalam penuh dengan rasa sebak. sebak sebab rindukan masa dulu. rindukan segalanya. rindukan kehidupan bersama dengan 'dia'.mungkin ada officemates yang perasan. cekya buat tak tahu aje. it's gonna be more worst if i talk about it with anyone.

*************************

anyways,cekya buka puasa dengan officemates kat paradise palace,sogo. alhamdulillah, food dia not bad. buffet for RM19.90++. taklah mahal sangat compared to other buffet yang kat hotels around kl nih. ada yang sampai rm90++...makan ke,buat kenduri tu?hehehhe....

jom la sesiapa nak belanja cekya...;)

take care people.
wassalam

p/s : alhamdulillah, awak bahagia sekarang dengan life dan family. jaga diri elok-elok,moga Allah sentiasa memberkati kehidupan awak, isteri dan baby awak.


Tuesday, November 02, 2004

panjang umurnya!

salam blog...

semalam, 1st november, adalah birthday mak cekya. we had a simple celebration. i bought her a carrot cake, 2 chef wan's cooking books and also a wrist watch.



then lepas isya',my nieces,ira & ika came. kemain excited nyanyi lagu happy birthday untuk tok auntie diorang. hehehe....

anyways, cekya still in the same mood,like i've been for the past few days. and i have lost a friend due to my behaviour. it seems that i'm just too mengada-ngada,i guess. entahlah...Allah saja yang tahu apa yang cekya rasa masa ni. if he/she does not want to understand or learn to understand and mengharap pada cekya sahaja untuk memahami sifat dan tingkah laku dia,then cekya tak mampu. it's not gonna be a fair relationship. it's not gonna be an honest one...

cekya rasa betul-betul letih dengan keadaan sekarang. i felt like curling myself in bed,under the covers and tidur untuk satu jangka masa yang panjang and when i'm refreshed,i'll be up and ready to face my life...

betapa lemahnya cekya waktu ini. and despite having lotsa so-called friends, i'm actually alone. apa pun,cekya berterima kasih kat zuril,and all other friends kat doneeh.com yang sudi bagi encouragement pada cekya...take care friends...

wassalam!

p/s : untuk kawan yang dah tak sudi nak kawan dengan cekya tu,terima kasihlah untuk masa awak. maaf sebab tiba-tiba rasa nak mengadu hal dan mengharap agar awak menenangkan saya tapi yang sebaliknya berlaku. i guess it's only me whom has to be by your side but it's actually up to you to be around or menghilang.

Monday, November 01, 2004

*sigh*

salam....

malam ni hujan.cekya rasa tak best sangat.not only tonite tapi it's been going on for days.i've made a few people truly upset and angry with me.entah lah...

cuma yang cekya boleh cakap,cekya rasa tak best.

rasa bengang aje.and i'd prefer to keep quiet.cekya rasa tak sedap badan,plus the emotional thingy,is taking a toll on me.ada saja kata-kata orang disekeliling cekya yang buatkan cekya marah dan berkecil hati.things got worst when people couldn't care less.

cekya pun tak salahkan diorang.i'm the one who's having the emotional crisis.this is so crazy!and weird too!!

rasa macam ada sesuatu dalam diri cekya that i have to let 'it' out.by keeping 'it' in myself,i feel terrible and sesak.astaghfirullah 'al 'azim....kenapa cekya ni?

wassalam...

p/s : pada yang tinggal msg kat doneeh...thanx so much.cekya tak dapat nak balas...maaf sangat!apa pun,i truly appreciate your visits...:)