Wednesday, December 26, 2007
i believe it was a tiring morning. after the long or on and off hols, it's just bloody hard to start again.
it's 5 days to new year. i have so many high hopes for 2008. i've made some preparation to make my existing team strives better. and frankly, there are so many things that i have to improve. rasa perangai dah serupa ayah cekya. he established a consultancy of his own, doing everything from consulting to stamping his letters, invoices, etc.
ikut perangai ayah kot. haihhh!
but it's just tiring doing stuff alone. i had kak yati handle the admin stuff and let her decide[which sometimes she wants me to decide also - alo sista, i'm formally giving you a full pledge of authority for you to decide on the admin stuff. hikhihkhik!]. she's been helping me out, thanx so much sista!
there loads of work to do, both office and the team. i just hoped to get to finish it the soonest. adeh. rasa macam penat and tak motivated to do anything. and i had weird dreams for the past few nights. bangun tu, i'm all sweaty. then asyik buang-buang air. baru cekya perasan yang i dok bantai prunes sebalang since last week. tu pasal amat 'lancar' proses pencernaan dia. cet!
oh yes, semalam, went to visit aan's mother. she was admitted a few weeks back, got a burst vein kat kepala dia and of course, haemorrhage comes into the picture. aan was tough, walaupun at times, she'll cry. all i can do is just be with her, even if i don't have the time to visit but i tried to make a point to visit her mom since the day she was admitted.
there were so many issues that she had to handle before going through the surgery but alhamdulillah, it all went well. she was in the ICU before and after the surgery, and on one of the occasions, her mom did make us worry. she was blabbering about things. doctor said that it was the effect of the drugs.
and few days after that, surprise, surprise, aan told me that her mom was transferred to the normal ward. she's recovering so fast. alhamdulillah we were all overjoyed.
then, 2 days before 'aidiladha, surprise, surprise, aan sent an sms that she's bringing her mom home. i was like, "uh?!". the doctor has allowed her to be discharge and to come for check-ups, as scheduled. alhamdulillah.
and yesterday, after a meeting with a client in shah alam, kak yati, julie & myself went to her house. aan's mom is not only recovering, she's walking, talking and laughing! alhamdulillah!
good or bad, i always 'enjoy' surprises. kalau good surprises, of course, it'll bring smile and joy. kalau bad surprises, it actually trains me to control myself of anger and sadness.
come to think of it, all these emotions that we feel, will definitely build us up as a human being, and makes us realise, we do HAVE flaws. it's a matter of not ignoring them, and to do something about it.
haihhh! easy to type it in words. and it's just so hard to do. sigh!
oh it's 5.30. gotta wrap up my work for today. nak balik awal and buat keje kat rumah la hari nih.
take care beloveds!
lotsa love, cekya.
Monday, December 24, 2007
i went thru some of my old writings. those writings just amazed me. macam orang lain yang tulis. it's just not like me, at all! hahahha..pelik eh.
and i did promise not to buy new handphone but bought 2 phones after that instead. my defend - manusia hanya merancang. hahhahaha...! and alot of things have been bought since then. and i still wonder, berapa ribu juta la have been spent to buy gadgets, cameras, stuff for the cameras and list goes on and on.
and here's the latest;
it's mac and i've been using windows for like ages. i'm still adjusting to the platform. and i've been spending my weekend with bro mac in bed, with this guy on the player;
thanx kak lun for the cd. it came right on time! melompat gua dapat package dari ratnawati jasman. hehehe....
anyways, how can you resist such weekend? hehehe... tapi tu lah. the price i have to pay - boredom. tido, terjaga. tido, terjaga. it's tiring! rasa lemah jek badan. probably i was busy for the past few weekends, that i longed for another hectic one. tapi mcm wtl cakap, enjoy it while we can!
been reading this book;
it's a chilling thriller containing mysteries, crime and unsolved cases. an underground chamber has been discovered on the property of a former Boston mental hospital containing six small naked mummified female bodies in clear garbage bags. malam semalam, i was in the middle of the book and the story started to get creepy. terus letak buku kat sebelah, off lampu and went under the blankets. hahahah..takot! i seram uols! hahahahaha!
nih cekya baru lepas lunch and rasa melayang la. macam nak jatuh. napa eh? letih betul la macam nih.
anyways, have a great off day tomorrow and kerja semula on wednesday!
lotsa love, cekya
Friday, December 21, 2007
it's a relaxing day. bosses pun tak ada. i've been 'stealing' office's time to complete a wedding job. pictures has been burnt to dvd, slideshow pun dah settle. semua dah ready to be delivered.
wtl's made a post that makes me think. or rather sad, actually.
i've been meeting alot of men lately. the wrong men. cekya rasa rimas dan lemas. i mean, these types je ke yang tinggal kat malaysia? unstable jobs. irresponsible. not wanting to settle down. not wanting to have a long relationship[oh yeah, they prefer a one night stand]. only one thing in their minds, s.*.x. kalau umur early twenties tu, gua boley accept la but ni dah 30+. takkan tak boleh fikir? ntah ah. thinking about it makes me furious, but talking about it makes me even madder. i've been doing and sacrifying alot. and i get nothing in return. not that i hoped for any but i guess, things should be working in 2 directions.
in the other hand, i kept thinking, am i the one with problems. yelah, orang kata, keep pointing your forefinger and the others shall be pointing at you. i guess i have to sit and list down what is actually wrong with me. maybe, banyak salah cekya yang cekya tak nampak. maybe, ada benda yang i have to look into. or improve, as a matter of fact. well accepting one's own flaws IS difficult. tapi kena buat jugak nampaknya.
alhamdulillah, i'm busy with work and wedding jobs, therefore forbids me to feel at least a teeny weeny bit of loneliness. but still. it's just within me. surrounding me. and i'm afraid it shall eats me alive. *sigh*
Ya Allah, please let these bad feelings away from me.
sincerely, as always,
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
it's 12 days to 2008. another hectic year, i presume. with all the new things planned, dari hal-hal office, to my personal plans. macam-macam nak fikir and to organise. haihhh!! thinking and planning all those made me even more tired than ever.
i watched a movie kelmarin. heartbreak kid. memang lawak. first few sentences pun dah buat cekya tergelak besar. and cerita nih, if you get the joke, you'll get it. kalau tak faham, then you'll be quiet when everybody's laughing like hell. heheheh...
well semalam round-round klcc with my colleague. bought a birthday present for myself. hehehe....it's my forever CK Be.
dari zaman student lagik pakai this perfume. kumpul duit to buy. ingat lagi, it was only RM150 with gifts and goodies. dah
naik harga sket la...cuma dapat 2 miniature this time round. takpelah.
and ahmad got me this;
tapi tak amik lagi. he bought it for me masa visit his wife in the uk. tak sabar nak amik but i guess we're both a bit busy. he's like;"weyyy!! when are you gonna take this terrible and smelly perfume from me???". siot jek. wangi tau! ngok ngek punya ahmad.
penat and hectic, didn't take me away from loneliness, as always. like whennn this kinda stuff will stop bugging me??!! letey ah.
anyways, do enjoy some piccas from the taman rama-rama visit with wtl & awan.
lastly, have a great raya korban, dear friends.
lotsa love, cekya.
p/s : kak lun, it's a dragonfly la sayang. not butterfly...;)