...colours...

...how i wish the colours of life's more than just blue...

..tears in heaven..

i tried to hold it back.
i forced myself not to allow it to happen.
but who am i to turn everything back.
to let things back at its places.
and i cried. hard.

talked to tatot for a while, she had something to do, so fine. i
i guess by not talking about it would make things better.

nah!

it got worst.

and i'm still in the office, half of the office's lights are off though it's only 630pm. i'm in my cubicle. letting my tears flow as they want to. i can't hold back.

not today. not now.

i've lost it all. my self-esteem, self confidence and everything associated with my goodself.

all of 'em.

..sampai..

Sayang
Apa yang ku katakan
Apa yang ku rasakan
Belum pernah dialami

Demimu segala ku kurniakan
Susah ku senangkan
Asal hajat dipenuhi

Di hati

Dan masih lagi engkau bertanya
Sejauh manakah cinta
Penjelasan ku sebenar-benarnya

Sampai..tubuh tak bernyawa
Sampai..ku ke pangkuannya
Biar jasad tak dilihat zahir
Cintaku tetapkan hadir

Andai dikurnia syurga
Kan ku tunggu di luarnya
Jika ditanya mengapa
Jawapan ku menungguk
Kau sampai dahulu

Mudahnya sekadar bermadah
Hingga kau meragui
Keikhlasan sanubari
Sedangkan racun pun kan ku telan
Andai kau menyatakan ia madu kepadaku

Oh sungguh..

Dan masih lagi engkau bertanya
Sedalam manakah cinta?
Lafaz ikrarku buat selamanya

Sampai tubuh tak bernyawa
Sampai ku kepangkuannya
Biar jasad tak dilihat zahir
Cintaku tetapkan hadir

Andai dikurnia syurga
Kan ku tunggu di luarnya
Jika ditanya mengapa
Jawapan ku menunggu
Kau sampai dahulu

Katakan sayang
Bagaimanakah harus ku hidup
Tanpa dirimu
Sedangkan separuhnya di jiwaku, bersamamu

Sampai tubuh tak bernyawa
Sampai ku kepangkuannya
Biar jasad tak dilihat zahir
Cintaku tetapkan hadir

Andai dikurnia syurga
Kan ku tunggu di luarnya
Jika ditanya mengapa
Jawapan ku menunggu kau sampai dahulu
Ohh..Kau sampai padaku

KRU - Sampai

superfluously sweet, like candy floss!

a hurtful lady with a flowery entry...

...i love the pink one, the most...

on & off..

salam!
pagi ni cekya rasa pening & letih. last nite, balik dari office, singgah klcc to buy my friend's wedding present. got him the lovely lace's photo album. gonna share it with 3 other friends. oklah tu, bill bahagi 4. hikhikhik...

anyways, sampai rumah, clean myself, terus tido. nyenyak betul. ramai pulak yang sms and call but i just couldn't afford to answer any of them. time kita free, tak ada benda buat, tak ada plak yang nak sms or call. time tengah sedap layan tido, berbunyi-bunyi phone cekya tuh. cet!

insya-Allah, my department will be having a new boss this thursday. hoped he'll be a good one. alhamdulilah, dapat lagi satu 'sheild' for the department. huhuhuhuhu!

take care people. wassalam.

smoochie!

this little lady is just so adorable, isn't she?
more of her >>> http://cekya.fotopages.com

rainy days and rooms...

salam!

i just got back from JB yesterday, arrived at about 11pm. i was dreaaaming of my bed on the way home. my pink soft bed. trip to JB memang exhausting, with ira & ika around.

masuk jek bilik, i thought i WAS still dreaming! half of the bed dah lencun, with a towel on it, with a basin on the smelly, heavy with water towel. i have expected some bocor on the ceiling but not this BAD. my brother is at home, expectedly, he should change the towels and he did nothing of that sort. marahnya cekya!!!

sudah la penat, macam tu pulak jadik. my bolster pun jadik mangsa. alhamdulillah, the other pillows are saved and i got to sleep at the other half of the bed. imagine nak tido dengan bau hapak macam tu! hideous!!!told my dad about it but he just looked up and went away. loh???

fine.

this morning, cekya let my room open, biarkan segalanyanya bergelimpangan, with messages for my ignorant brother to sent my comforter to the laundry. and i thought the men of the house would do something about the bocor.

cekya balik tadi and this is what i found;






yes, nothing was being done. or at least tukarkan the towel. it was all at its place, just the way i left the room this morning. gosh!! err...do ignore the 'maps' on the bolster. they were unintentional. hikhikhikhik!

and when i asked my dad, he said toilet belakang tak guna sangat so the tank macam overflow sket...and go where? my room? on my bed?

aduiii!! why can't they do anything about it. cekya mana la tahu benda-benda ni semua. tak kisah la sangat pasal bocor tu, sikit-sikit, i don't mind tapi pernah ada history, the tank pecah and the water flooded my room. flooded aje tak apa, but what if it falls on me, while i was sleeping.

i was SO disappointed.
still am.

gotta go guys. pray for my safety, for tonite, at least.
wassalam.

off...

salam!

i'm off for a long holiday. alhamdulillah, cuti dah approve.

take care people.

**hugs**

wassalam.

released?

salam!

it's 12.47am.
missed mai la...so i searched for her picture.
or did i missed the presents of a little baby?

duh!

nite people!

busy ke?tak sangatlah!

salam!

it was full of unexpected things happening for the past few days.
tuesday nite, i went for movie kat one utama with my closest friends. tengok cerita ni;

nice film la...best sangat. funny and sweet. siapa yang rasa lovey dovey tuh..leh gi tengok reese in action. she's just so pretty and cute. my feelings while watching this movie? just like heaven. hikhikhikhik...

anyways, i'm a little bit busy kat office ni. i'll usually list down what i should do the nite before tapi dah 2-3 hari tak dapat nak settlekan sebab banyak sangat yang impromptu. i have to clear up everything before friday sebab i'll be going back to jb this sunday, sampai tuesday, that is if my leave dapat approval. anything in jb? boss cekya tanya, nak kawin ke nih. hikhikhikhik..tak kotttt...huhuhuhuh....

talked about kahwin ni with tatot the other day. i still can't get over it la tot. whatever we talked about that nite.

oklah, gotta go. take care people! missed our old days!
wassalam!

sicko!

salam!

it's been a busy weekend. and i'm a little bit busy as well kat office ni. wished i could write and write. tapi rasa tak ada benda sangat nak ditulis.
cekya tak berapa sihat sangat. since kena asthma malam sabtu..dah berlarutan sampai ke pagi tadi, dok off and on.
hopefully, sihat semula la dalam 2-3 hari ni.
oh ye, cekya dapat upah anyam ketupat tadi. kahkahkahkah!! tapi pakai ribbon. ada officemate cekya nak pakai untuk apa ntah. sikit je, insya-Allah by thursday boley siap. hehehe....
gotta go guys. take care yea.
wassalam...

p/s: gambo atas tu definitely bukan kasut cekya tapi kasut mai...comel sangat, sangat, sangat, sangat. hikhikhikhik...

ethnic day!

salam!

tengok la kat atas tu. playlist cekya untuk hari ni. hehehe..irama malaysia gitu!
tatau la napa mood very the very the traditional. hikikhikhik...

anyways, semalam pi rumah ira & ika. masa nak balik tu, salam dengan ira;

cekya : cepatt salamm...mintak ampun! ira banyak dosa tau dgn auntie su...
ira : ampun tu apa?

adeh! spontaneous betul.

hari ni, busy lagi macam semalam. banyak pulak nak kena settle. naik lemas dibuatnya.
petang semalam cekya dah ngamuk. tapi bebel sendiri la. hehehe...

petang ni rasa macam dah merayap la. ke mana ek? kalau balik awal. boley la. kalau tidak...deng!

wassalam!

raya lagi...

salam!

cekya masuk office hari ni. kemain banyak kerja. tak sempat nak breakfast pun. hehehe...anyways, alhamdulillah, cekya selamat sampai kl malam semalam. beraya kat johor since sunday. first raya, ke muar, seronok berkumpul ramai-ramai;

then cekya balik kl semula and spent another 2 days kat kl. jumaat, sempat tengok wayang - chicken little. termakbul jugak harapan nak tengok chicken little dengan tatot. hikhikhikik...masa kat jb, cekya sempat singgah McDonald's, ada jual chicken little plush tu;

dengar cerita, kat kl, banyak outlet yang dah sold out. hehehe...orang johor tak suka benda-benda gini kot. tu yang ada stock tu. i end up berebut the plush dengan adik cekya yang bungsu. hehehe...mama geleng kepala je la. johor bahru was great. cekya stopped by at a few houses masa on the way ke jb last sunday. seronok dapat jumpa sedara mara. ada yang bubuh colok kaler pink. cayalah!!!

rumah arwah my grandparents was full of flowers. rasa macam musim bunga! rasa fresh sangat! macam-macam kaler but i like these the most;

usually raya wouldn't be the same without kids. my nieces & nephews were so alive and kicking bila sebut pasal duit raya! seronok berbual dengan diorang. ALL sorts of answers. silly & funny ones. kelakar betul!

insya-Allah, bila-bila nanti, kita jumpa lagi. not only on Raya, i hope.

cekya harap, you guys had fun on your raya. take care!

wassalam.

**29 Ramadhan 1426**~delayed entry.

salam!

cekya sibuk beno semalam. kemas bilik, tolong mak kat dapur. runner gi beli ketupat palas. adeh. busy!

and lepas buka puasa, i end up having asthma attack. sheesh! lepas isya' people start coming to our house. rupanya neighbours berkumpul rumah cekya untuk takbir. adeh. kitorang tak tahu menahu pun. ingatkan, our house would be the first house to start the takbir. kelam kabut la sediakan drinks and some fruits.

selesai takbir, me & my mom cuma rehat-rehat aje. keje dapur seua dah settle, lepak depan tv. hikhikhikhik...tahun ni, tak tahu kenapa, kurang kelam kabut. mak cekya pun cakap, dapur kita tak bersepah la kan. kalau tak, peninggg! hahahaha...

i'm writing this entry, pagi raya. tenang je kat luar. time cekya bangun awal tadi. hujan lebat. hujan rahmat. hujan di pagi syawal. cekya rasa sebak sangat. i wish i could meet each and every one of you. rindu rasa kat kawan-kawan. tak tahu kenapa.

apa pun, untuk yang nak beraya tu, drive carefully. kalau ngantuk, do stop or ganti driver. makan pun sikit-sikit je. nanti put on weight balik. hehehe...

take care people.
wassalam.

**28 Ramadhan 1426**

salam!

alhamdullillah, lagi 2 hari kita akan beraya. rasa sekejap betul ramadhan tahun ni. semalam, cekya berbuka dengan kawan-kawan rapat kat klcc. ramai betul orang shopping. anyways, hari ni, birthday mama cekya. nothing special. masing-masing keletihan. but i did bought her a pair of shoes last sunday. scholl! adeh. mahal la amats. tapi takpelah. cekya dah tak ada idea nak bagi hadiah apa. so i just pay for her shoes tu.

today, kemas-kemas ruang tamu. changed all the cushion covers and did come vacuuming. then konon nak kemas bilik but i ended up sleeping. hahahaha..too tired i guess. macam malam semalam, balik dr buka puasa, cekya baring, kononnya sekejap je, then nak bangun mandi. sekali....sedar-sedar dah pukul 5 pagi. erk! dah ngarut dah perangai cekya 2-3 hari ni. penangan peristiwa jumaat lepas agaknya.

how do i feel at this moment? sama macam bunga kemboja kat atas tu...terlangkup & layu jek. damn!

take care people. and jangan membazir for your raya preparation!
wassalam.