haihh!

kenapa ek?


i have this life, filled with SO many things to do. so many things to think about. so many things to be delivered. yet i just feel so empty.


aku rasa aku banyak benda to take care of. and my weekends are usually packed. dan aku rasa terlalu banyak benda tergendala yang aku tak ada rasa nak buat. rasa sangat kosong. zero. yillek.


*istighfar*


kenapa ek?


time yang crucial macam ni, aku lembik. malas nak handle masalah. malas nak selesaikan kerja-kerja yang tergendala. aku, kalau boleh tak nak fikir apa-apa. in fact, aku rasa macam tak nak ada kena mengena dengan life aku yang sekarang ni.


pelik? mengada? cakap la apa pun. it's your call to judge and it's me dealing with my life. obviously not you. so, shut off! ahh...that feels good. hehe.


how i wish, i can be THAT spontaneous. and having the guts.

kalau bengang dengan colleague who complaints alot about her workload, i wish i could blast off and say something spicy, like these;

"ello cik kepoci, you're talking as if no one in this room is working" or

"you're talking as if we're not tired" or

"you're talking as if you didn't surf those forum rooms whenever you have no work to do!"

"you're talking and i know your puny brain is functioning and you blabber all day long but say NOTHING, catch ma drift??!!"


*ahh..heaven!*

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

all that, was last week. i'm a little sober. ada a few kerja yang dah gerak. and the fact that there are more things to do, didn't trigger any emotional distress. alhamdulillah.

my colleague, she's still the same. same 'ol, same 'ol. siap bagi announcement. dia tak layak lagi untuk handle meeting preparation. ada banyak lagi important stuff to do. eh? kerja simple maa. takkan tak boleh buat sendiri. tak salah rasanya, kan? anda juga pernah berada di bawah.

but anyway, tentang kerja2 yang terbengkalai, rasanya kena buat listing la. and to divide them into two. work. job.

work ++ kerja2 office yang bertambah sejak akhir2 nih.

job ++ artwork2 dan kerja2 photography yang liat hendak disiapkan. [ada yang dah selesai. amin.]

untuk 2 weekends yang akan datang, i'll not be in town. akan ke PD untuk a small family day with my colleagues, kira cuti-cuti bikin sendiri.[this one contributed to my headache. ada yang complaint2, rate bilik mahal. 2-3 kali cekya downgrade bilik. dia agree. kelmarin dia hantar email, tak jadi pergi. ada hal family. family comes first katanya.citt podah!]

and on chinese new year, ada trip ke perak, an engagement to shoot. kerja-kerja-kerja.

itu aje kot update buat masa ni.

till later!

love, cekya