Mak Long.

Cekya punya zaman kanak-kanak & remaja yang biasa-biasa saja. Punya parents yang berkerja, cuti sekolah selalunya hanya di rumah. Adik Cekya semuanya lelaki. Boring. :D No girlish stuff please! Ya, kadangkala bercuti ke mana-mana tapi, yang paling Cekya suka, rumah Pak Long di Johor Bahru.

Rumah biasa-biasa yang penghuninya sangat amazing, Cekya kira. Kalau diizinkan ayah, dari mula cuti, sampai ke hujung, Cekya akan di rumah Pak Long. Mereka hanya bertiga, termasuk Mak Long & anak bungsu mereka. K.Fizah. Kakak & abang-abangnya tinggal sendiri. Jarak umur yang tidak terlalu*she's a few years older*, buat kami rapat. Cekya diheret ke sana ke mari. Malah pernah ke bandar malam-malam naik bas yang senget.*Cekya hampir percaya penyebabnya Cekya sendiri. hahaha!*

Mak Long. Walau Mak Long berkerja, dia akan memastikan segala yang perlu ada buat kami sebelum keluar rumah awal-awal pagi. Seperti ibu-ibu lain. Breakfast, lunch! Sungguh, Cekya tak ingat sangat apa yang K.Fizah & Cekya buat seharian dan bila sore menjelang, kami menunggu Mak Long di buaian. Dari jauh, terlihat kelibatnya berjalan perlahan dari jalan besar, pulang dari tempat kerja dengan seikat kuih tergenggam kemas di tangan.

Mak Long sedikit garang. Tapi aku tahu, dia sangat memanjakan K.Fizah & Cekya. Ibu yang sangat memahami.

Melihat keadaannya yang terkedang di katil buat Cekya menjerit dalam hati.

Mak Long Cekya yang dulunya berisi & tinggi, kini sangat kecil tubuhnya! * she weighs less than 40kg!*

Mak Long Cekya yang dulunya lasak ke sana ke mari, kini kaku kiri tubuhnya!

Mak Long Cekya yang hanya mampu merenung tanpa ada tenaga untuk berbual-bual lagi!

Luluh hati bila Mak Long dah tak ada upaya lagi. Sukarnya. Risaunya.* I feel helpless!*

Andai dapat Cekya pikul kesakitan yang Mak Long rasa.

Doktor kata hanya ada 6 bulan. Mungkin kurang dari itu. Maka bersedialah untuk apa jua. :(

Mak Long, Cekya hanya mahu yang terbaik untukmu. Bila tengok kekuatan sepupu-sepupu Cekya, Cekya tahu, Cekya harus redha.

Cekya mahu Mak Long terus bersama kami.
Tapi tak sanggup tengok Mak Long lelah begitu.

Pulihkan Mak Long, Ya Tuhan!
Sembuhkanlah dia.
Pulangkanlah senyumnya kembali.

;-(

hidden cousins.

salam...

i have an uncle, who has another family. yes, another son, another daughter. yes, another wife.

the son's tying the knot in december, and my uncle wants my dad being one of the representative for nikah. fine.

this son of his, never saw us. only the daughter. and once, only.

i've been sending messages to the daughter that it'll be great if she can bring her brother, and the fiancee to come and meet up with my dad. my parents thought that it's an appropriate thing to do. so do i.

unfortunately, they've been having plans every first saturday of the month, when we were having our monthly tahlil.

but this month's reply was not much of a difference, and i can't help it but to send a cynical reply.

"oh ok...tapi kalau boleh mintak la ur brother dtg kenal2 dgn my dad. tak silap he'll be the wakil for hadri's nikah...mcm pelik la pulak, pengantin tak kenal wakil sendiri. hehehe... "

and then she replied,

" tula,sepatutnya macam tu kan..=(
nana pon tak paham perangai my brother,takpe,nanti i cucuk abah to paksa him jumpa your dad. =)
dont worry,sampaila ktorg nnt..;p"

what does that mean?! the son's been avoiding seeing my dad? he's been avoiding his own family? the same as the others are doing to my dad?! what's going on?!!! i know, i'm probably being difficult and think about it too much sampai bawak ke mimpi...:( but i just can't help it...

i've promised myself. today's the last the invitation. no more, kiddos.

felt like my dad has only my mom, me, my brothers, and my sister in-law. just the six of us. it's so bloody sad! :(

felt like crying buckets.

nite. :(

full fledge weekends!

truthfully.

i'm loving my packed weekends. and it's packed with friends, old and new, and families. 

and i think i'm a facebookaholic! haih. that thing is so addictive!

but it did good stuff. like finding old flames friends...:D

lately, been having these cruel dreams of fighting with my dad's siblings & my cousins, on defending my dear dad. oh it's a huge smelly ugly family thingy. didn't think about it too much actually. but it has repeatedly been in my dreams. and when i woke up, it's really tiring. emotionally AND physically. why eh? makes me malas during the day sebab too tired. sigh.

a lovely thing happened last saturday! met rai for the first time. seronok ok! like i hold her hand and hugged her so tight. sorry rai if you got crushed! coz it's been years, kan sis? luv ya!

truly hoped that k.lun, k.emmy, biah & azell were around. havoc lagi agaknya. mau terbalik itu pavillion! hehehehe...

hopefully can go s'pore and see these lovely ladies plak!

have a great day!

it's cruel but it's the truth!

phew!

i've been away for quite some time!

so many things have changed. i'm partly happy.

and the unhappy part, i'm glad some of my friends understand.

but not most of them.

it's just so annnoying when they have everything that i don't, and still wants to comment, as if they don't have all that, and start thinking & saying things like, they might not be happy after all. i just hate it when my friends, so called close friends, for years, still don't get me. and expect me, to 'get' you!

oh come on! be grateful to Allah! i am, for what i have. and i pray hard for the things i want.

it's as simple as that.

so please, stop bullshitting.

i apologise. i'm so annoyed.

on a much much brighter side, i'm meeting masyi & rai tomorrow. bliss!

and i'll be heading for lumut late in the evening for a job on sunday morning. i love my busy weekends now! really!

i'm missing friends i met last sunday. kadok, aisyah, richa, addy, amar and as! oh, ms birthday gurl, k.yati!

happy birthday sweets!