lost!

salam…

it was partly annoying yesterday. mood takde dan sebagainya.i even cancelled my plans to go for swimming. rugi duit jek sign up for the membership. tamau bayar for next month la. the only thing that made me smile was the pictures i send for printing. it turned out good! cekya rasa cantek sangat. especially mai’s expression compilation piece. it was worth paying tengoklah kat bawah nih;

and petang tadi, i got a bad news. my colleague’s brother passed away. accident. the saddest part was tracking her coz she was on vacation with her hubby. cekya rasa dia nak privacy and decided to off her hp. in the end, she didn’t even know that her brother dah tak ada. adui sedihnya cekya. my heart goes out to her. cekya try call dari petang, after i got the news, sampailah malam. around 10, i got thru! masa tu rasa excited campur panic. she just arrived kat airport. i guess she already got the news from the smses sent kot. when i told her, she was ok but very very shocked. i asked her whether dia dah call her dad yang dok sibuk cari dia for the past few days, tapi dia kata belum. so i asked her to call her dad first. then ½ hour later, she called me back asking what actually happen. then she said that she’s on the way back to tangkak, her parents’ place.

cekya harap, dia banyak-banyak bersabar. dan harap-harap ayah dia tak marah when she reach home. i can understand her family’s frustration for not being able to contact her. and to be honest, if i'm her, i'm not sure how am i to confront my parents of me being uncontactable(ayam, ada ke perkataan ni in english? hikhikhikhik)...

a bit busy today, i might be writing more later. daaa people!

wassalam…

p/s : dear friends, please do not worry. i’m alrite. ;)

khayalan bersamamu..

aku rasa macam ada something..
yang bottled up in my mind, my heart, my soul..
rimas sangat..
sebab aku tak tahu macam mana nak luahkan..
betul ke kata-kata "some things are better left unsaid",
boleh digunapakai?
valid ke?
aku rasa, dalam case aku nih, memang tak boleh la!
sakit dada!
sakit jiwa!
tapi aku rasa cukup susah untuk ceritakan..
apa yang ada dalam hati aku..
huh..bila sebut pasal apa yang ada dalam hati..
mata aku berair, sama meraung dengan hati aku..
ketawa aku dah tak boleh nak cover sebak aku..
lawak bangang aku pun dah tak boleh nak lindung segala sedih aku..
kenapa jadi macam ni?
kenapa aku tak boleh control diri aku sendiri?
jenuh aku pujuk diri sendiri.
to get over it.
to let everything go.
and be on my own.
dan berdiri atas perasaan sendiri.
tak payah nak babitkan orang lain dalam hal nak handle feelings aku sendiri.
semalam.
aku nangis. aku teresak.
dah lama aku tak nangis macam tu sekali.
rasa lega sikit.
tapi aku masih rasa sebak.
sampai sekarang ni.
letihnya melawan perasaan ni.
and now, i felt numb. blank terus.
kenapa dengan aku ni?

bad bat!

salam....

sedar tak sedar, dah 5 hari cekya diam dan tak blog apa-apa. hikhikhikhik...actually, i've been busy buat posting kat fotopages. hehehe..kemain banyak upload gambar, sampai tak sedar yang blog cekya dah berabuk sket. hehehe...

anyways, nothing much happened. jumaat petang, pi swimming dengan tatot. aiseh. macam ikan paus la cek kak nih. berapa kilometer dia swim, tak ada la cekya kira tapi cekya baru 2 lap, dah mengah tahap cipan. itu pun ada r&r kat tengah-tengah pool. tapi dia dah 18 lap(adapun 18 lap ada exxageration yang terlampau...harap maklum)huuuu....sungguh dasyat.hikhikhikhik...

and on saturday, managed to get the curtains with my mom. my cousin, my aunts, mai & ira pun ikut. kemain diorang shopping kain. cekya tengok jek la. tak dapat nak join sebab tengah saving untuk road tax & insurans wira bulan 10 ni. kalau ada lebih nanti, insya-Allah, nak beli gak sepasang for raya. errr...cek ayam, nak beli baju sama kaler tak? muakakakkaka....well last nite, someone answered 'yes!' when i called him 'ayam!'...hahaha...klakar!klakar!

anyways, petang sabtu tu, went to watch batman begins with my friends. best jugak.the storyline bukan macam batman yang kita tengok before this. it's extremely different. go watch!..mamat batman tu amatlah comel. hikhikhikh...

********
on a sour note.
went thru something which made me cry last nite. actually, dah lama jugak cekya tak menangis and there goes the tears. i know, things would be better than what had happen. i do believe in that.
insya-Allah, things will get better. in the mean time, i'm just blur & blank.
till later, wassalam!

sepak raga...sepak kang!

salam...

today is a sleepy day.. deng!

pagi ni dapat sms from a friend. mood angin jugak. aiseh. nampaknya angin cekya dah terberjangkit kat dia. sorry ah friend!

semalam, lepak-lepak dengan mama & adik cekya, borak-borak pasal family, pasal rumah, pasal kereta dan tetiba masuk la bab wedding anak kepada cousin ayah cekya. dalam kad jemputan tu bunyik macam ni;

"Bukanlah menjadi adat pada kita orang melayu untuk memberikan hadiah apabila berlangsungnya majlis perkahwinan dan kami sekeluarga tidaklah mengharapkan apa-apa pemberian, tetapi, jika pihak tuan masih mahu memberi cenderahati, terdapat beberapa tempat yang menjadi pilihan pasangan pengantin, iaitu di;

-metrojaya, household department, section 14, petaling jaya
-best denki, suria klcc
-ombak, suria klcc

Pemberian tuan, didahului dengan ucapan terima kasih."

muakakakkaka....alahai. tak payah, tapi mention pulak nak hadiah dari certain kedai. kelakar betul. actually memang before this, dia buat majlis anak dia pun, sama jugak macam tu. adik cekya ada sebut, kad kahwin dia nanti, dia nak letak kedai pilihan pengantin adalah naza motors, kg baru & mofaz, ttdi. hahahaha...adeh ler. nak mintak kereta la pulak!

malam semalam, cekya susah nak tido gara-gara fikir nak bubuh nama kedai apa. kalau you all (yang belum berkahwin saja ye. kak lun, jamri, kadok dan yang lain-lain tu, sila perhatikan saja), nak hadiah dari kedai mana?

fikir, jangan tak fikir!hikhikhikhik....

wassalam!

bunga telur...

salam....

i had another boring night. tv rosak, dah hantar petang semalam tapi apek repair tu tak ada call pulak. he promised to call for cost estimation tapi, till now, tak ada call. nampak gayanya, tak dapat la nak tengok konsert akademi fantasia sabtu ni. tapi musim ni, i'm not a fan of any of the students. saja suka-suka tengok. lain la ada orang tu..hikhikhikhikhik

semalam, after office, cekya pi club, swimming and pi sauna. rasa ngantuk, tired gila and had a little headache. i guess it's because i went off the pool abruptly. tak relax-relax dulu, terus keluar from pool after one lap. apa lagi. rasa cam nak melayang. pastu, masa nak naik lrt balik, cekya carik my travel card dlm handbag, tak ada pulak! duh! i left it on my table kat office. tak pasal-pasal kena waste rm5 for both last nite and this morning's trip to office. careless cekya!!

ada yang tanya, masih marah lagi ke? alhamdulillah, dah takde rasa marah cuma a bit somber at the mo. i'm quite disappointed on the progress of a few stuff that have been happening to me & my life. questions like why should it happen that way? why can't it be as simple and nice as possible? why do i feel different, different from who i am and how things are going before? do i deserve such treatment? entah lah. maybe tu semua yang membuatkan cekya marah sebab i don't have answers for myself. rasa tertekan yang membuatkan cekya marah. i was fully devastated. masalah jiwa betul lah kan?

kejap ok, gelak-gelak, ketawa, buat lawak bangang, laughing out loud.
another moment, i'm down, angry, frustrated, annoyed and felt like shouting my lungs out.

what's happening, girl?

bye people. wassalam.

p/s : i'm pretty sure, it's not pms. anyways, i've posted a few pictures on my fotopages, masa birthday celebration for my dad. enjoy!

marah, angry, bose, fache, enojado - i'm just pissed!

salam...

owh i am extremely annoyed. it causes heartache. no. not sakit hati but the real pain. i got chest pains sebab rasa marah yang payah nak dikawal. i did talk to tatot and i managed to get pissed at someone yang pijak kepala adik dia dengan those studded boots. and also, her old friend. huhuhuhu...

entah lah. i planned to go to the club for swimming, among other things, but my colleague was all busy attending some meeting. so i decided to go off. nope. tak marah kat dia, but i have to sent my huge, giant to for fixing. rosak pulak semalam. left a note on her table and went off. in the lrt, i managed to jeling a few people yang dok halang cekya nak jalan or move dalam lrt. then dah dapat tempat sandar, i notice this guy staring at me. agaknya dia pelik tengok cekya kumat-kamit. masa tu tengah istighfar ulang-ulang kali coz i was so angry. jahat betul syaitan ni la kan? and that guy dapatlah hadiah jelingan manja+marah cekya. aiseh! ntah la.

sampai sekarang pun rasa marah lagik. rasa nak nangis tapi airmata tak keluar pulak! erghhhhh!!!!!

astaghfirullah'al'azeem....!

daa people...wassalam!

p/s : danny, good luck in your papers. study smart. you owe me 2 weeks supplies of nasi ayam. hahahahahha!!!

KTM oh KTM!

salam...

petang semalam, managed to get presents for my dad & my cousin. sabtu ni, we'll be having family dinner kat pakeeza, a moghul restaurant, somewhere in section 14. huhuhuhu...i bought bodyshop's perfume for my cousin and this book for my dad;

i just hope he'll like it. dah tak ada idea nak belikan apa. insya-Allah, he'll turn 57 this sunday. he's been a great dad. though we don't really talk, i know he's great...!

anyway, cekya ada satu cerita besh! do read..
masa nak ke mid valley, dengan ayu dan control lawa sebab pakai high heels, cekya naik kommuter arah ke seremban. nak ke mid valley. nampak 2-3 orang kat platform. dalam hati, kutuk diorang, sebab tak naik kommuter tu dan nak tunggu the next train. bodohnya. dah ada ni, naik ajelah. mungkin tak nak bersesak. mengada betul! bukannya ramai sangat dalam kommuter waktu tu!
kommuter bergerak. cekya senyum-senyum. alangkah bestnya ke mid valley. tak perlu tempuh jem. tak perlu nak risau kalau terlewat sebab dah janji dengan kawan, pukul 6.30. kommuter semakin laju.
and the speed increased. dan melepasi signboard mid valley!
huh?
apsal dia tak stop kat mid valley? gulp!
cekya masih maintain lawa. dan tak nak sangat nampak cuak dan gabra. Allah saja yang tahu betapa dup!dap!dup!dap! jantung masa tu. rasa nak kopak pintu kommuter pun ada. rasa nak terjun dari kommuter.
takper. cekya diam dan mata melilau tengok keliling. ada a few people dah bertanya-tanya. pasang telinga.
rupanya kommuter tu, express ke seremban. friends, express di sini bermaksud, non-stop.
seremban?!!
seReMbaN?!!
SEreMbaN?!!
aduhai. dahi dah berpeluh. tiba-tiba rasa menyesal naik kommuter. tiba-tiba rasa menyesal sebab kutuk orang yang tunggu kommuter kat station tadi. i'm suppose to wait with them! uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!
takper. control lawa lagi. kommuter beransur perlahan bila dah nak sampai bandar tasik selatan.
alhamdulillah. it stopped and i manage to change kommuter. nasib baik, tak berapa jauh dari mid valley. cuma 3 station. kalau tidak, memang cancel la plan nak tengok wayang - madagascar. tiket dah beli. huhuhu...

so, moral dari cerita tersebut. jangan pergi mid valley! hahahahahahah!!!!!!! adeh! apa la nasib semalam yea?

anyways, gotta go. happy weekends guys!
wassalam.

the one & only...

salam...

today, cukup senyap. even keliling cekya riuh rendah, it is senyap for me. semalam, i slept at about 930pm. masa tu tengah tengok csi new york. tapi mata memang tak tahan lagi. terus masuk bilik and doze off. sempat gaduh dengan mat ayam on sms before tido tu. huhuhuhu...siapa mat ayam? encik mat ayam, please reveal yourself....hikhikhikhik

around 3am, cekya tersedar. perut sakit. went to the toilet, siap mandi sekalik! huhuhuhu...beshnya! tapi takleh buat selalu. nanti kena pneumonia macam 3 years back , masa cekya kerja kat stock-broking company. mana tidaknya, i'll be home at around 2-3am, takkan la tak mandi before going to bed. at last, meradang la paru-paru cekya. huhuhuhu...

semalam, i've talked to somebody on how i feel when the person treated me in certain ways, on which memang cekya tak berkenan. alhamdulillah, dia dapat faham. mula-mula tu malas nak cakap, tapi dia still nak tahu why i kept myself away. so cekya telah membentangkan beberapa perkara yang dia sendiri agree, memang salah dia. memang lepas dia, cekya dah tak kuasa nak rapat dengan siapa-siapa.

lonely, i feel lonely sekarang nih. silly unwanted feelings. duh! shhhuuhhh lonely! go away!

daaa!
wassalam.

zainol's angels...

they came over to visit us last nite, when i truly missed these girls! hikhikhik...

lonely?

salam...

badan cekya sengal-sengal hari ni. semalam dok try cindy crawford's workout routine. lepas 15 minit, cekya dah terduduk. enough said! muakakakakka!!!

nothing much happened on my weekend.

friday evening, went for movies dengan tatot. mr & mrs smith. aiseh. best! best! best! berbaloi la cekya naik kommuter dengan bau ketiak garing dalam tu, rasa nak pitam! hikhikhikhik....

on saturday, pi beli kain untuk buat baju raya, for my brothers, my dad & my mom. cekya pun beli sepasang. beli kain yang sama dengan mama cekya, cuma lain-lain colour. hikhihkik...the last time i made baju kurung, using the same material as my mom masa cekya kat tadika kot. huhuhuhu.... then, pi swimming kat mppj's swimming pool dengan cek julie. orang ramai la pulak! eisk sungguh tak selesa bila orang dok tinjau-tinjau kita. or cekya nih perasan. hikhikhikhik! we went home just in time untuk tengok akademi fantasia. i guess we don't really have to talk about mawi's performance anymore. ever. i'm not a fan but still, dia nyanyi ke laut la! adeh!

and i went to a friend's wedding on saturday, an old collegemate. you guys can check the pics out kat my fotopages. then, we went for movies kat ou. watched a lot like love. hmm...i guess the malay title for that movie is "kalau jodoh, tak ke mana.."hehehehe....watch it guys! mr kutcher is just so damn adorable. huhuhuh....

gotta go guys. wassalam..!

from me, to you...

"...entah berapa, kali ku cuba
membohong hati, ku ini
hebat dilanda, rindu padamu
namun, semua alasan
rapuh bagaikan, awan berarak
yang memang tidak pernah abadi
dan terlalu cepatnya berlalu..."
- dari kekasih kepada kekasih, hattan

penipu, penipu, seluar terbakar!

salam...

just for you guys' punya info and precautions. tadi cekya receive call dari seseorang. kat handphone tulis private no and i believe, the call was made using a handphone as well. he claimed that he's from a services company(tatau ah dia service apa!huh!) and he's giving away some card for visa/mastercard holder.

dia confirm balik nama penuh cekya and asked when will the card expires. cekya pun cakap la, 2008, bulan 2. then he asked me to flip my card and read the numbers yang kat belakang card tu kat dia.

"you tengok dekat belakang card tu, tolong bacakan nombor-nombor tu. i already have your particulars, cuma nak confirmkan semula la..."

aisey! time ni, cekya sudah cuak! then i asked him;

"actually you nak buat apa dengan detail ni semua? kenapa you tak mintak cetibank terus?"

"kita nak confirmkan particulars you, kalau semua ok, kita akan hantar you punya card-lah."

"card apa? services apa? i tak faham-lah!"

"kita bagi services untuk visa and masters card holder"

"what kind of services?"

"takde. kita nak confirmkan. nanti kita akan hantar semua kat you lah."

"kalau you nak, you mintak kat cetibank. confirmkan particulars i kat cetibank. diorang pun ada the same particulars."

"no! you tak faham! i nak confirmkan particulars you aje!"

time tu mamat nih dah jerit-jerit, macam annoyed dengan cekya sebab tak bagi co-operation.

"sorrylah i tak interested. i tak faham apa yang you cakap."

masa ni, cekya pun dah naik minyak jugak. paksa-paksa plak mamat nih! pastu dia terus cakap "bye!" sambil letak telefon tahap boleh berkecai gegendang telinga cekya.

kalau betul pun, takleh ke explain? naik takut pulak.

to all, be careful lah. sekarang ni, macam-macam cara diorang nak tipu kita, right?

take care people. daaa!

packed!

salam...

this week, cekya memang extremely busy. nope. bukan busy kerja tapi busy dengan after-office activities. huhuhuhu..it all started on tuesday, ada orang suggest cekya and 2 other colleagues pergi fitness center kat one of the hotels kat area kl ni jugak. so, off we went. they' re giving a very,very, very reasonable price to use their gym, swimming pool, sauna, siap dengan jacuzzi sekali. they even gave us a trial day! maka, dengan happy dan terujanya, test la sauna & jacuzzi. aiseh. best la pulak! hehehe..and i arrived home at about 10pm.

pastu semalam, i went for swimming dengan cek julie & her officemates, kat uitm shah alam. semalam, the pool memang untuk girls only. kira ladies day la. rasa mengah sangat sebab cekya dah lama tak swim. aiseymen! huhuhu...

hari ni pulak, nak gi fitness center kat hotel tu semula. we've decided to sign up for the club. lambat lagi la cekya balik hari ni. and tomorrow, i've planned for dinner and movie dengan tatot. talk about tatot, she's in a trauma. trauma ke tot? yang cekya tahu, tatot dalam keadaan risau + takut coz of something that might have happened kat rumah dia malam semalam. alhamdulillah, nothing bad happen and she's on emergency leave today. hoped she'll login and reply to my posting nih. update us with your condition, tot!

relax friend! baca ayatul-Qursi banyak-banyak yea...;)

wassalam!

demi langkah..

sentiasa bersama
walau ribut, walau terik
masih mahu terus berdua
umpama dilahir kembar
ke mana saja bersama
bertapak ke sana sini
malah berwarna serupa
semuanya senada
semuanya bermain irama
akan terus kekalkah
segalanya, yang hanya rupa
yang terlindung dari mata
yang tertutup dari jiwa kasar
akan kekalkah?
cekya - 070605 - 3:31pm

first day!

salam...

aiseymen. pening! office cekya baru dapat gm legal baru. alahai. fussy dan pushy yang amats. sudah la nak laptop yang macam-macam. nak accessories itu ini. alahai... dia nih nak keje, or nak buat kedai computer dalam office dia tu?

and his last minute request, and wants it fast, membuatkan cekya bertambah pening. tatau la. since incident makan kambing tuh, i'm having slight headache. rasa nak muntah all the freakin' time. bila dah tengok banyak quotations and all sorts or computer equipment, rasa pening bukan main!

anyways, pagi tadi, cekya dengan mak cekya dok kacau my youngest brother. he's gonna be on his first day at work! hahahaha...dah start his industrial training. sepatutnya next week but all of a sudden, boss dia panggil kerja today. first time tengok dia cuak gitu. he was worrying about what to wear, should he cut his long hair, nak kena bawak any notebooks or pen. alahai....cekya tak tahan nak gelak bila mak cekya cakap kat dia gini semalam >> "haaa....jangan tengok lagi akademi fantasia tuh! pegi tido! esok keje!"..hikhikhikhik....

i just can't believe it la! i remembered, he was a small little comel boy. now, he's actually working. even if it's a training, but still...huhuhu

to my bro, selamat berkerja. best of luck to you!

wassalam...

teh susu...

salam....



wow! packed betul weekend cekya. and i was busy too. alhamdulillah, the cukur jambul went well. meriah sangat. and petang sikit, we had ika's birthday. check out my fotopages. loads of pics. biasalah cekya, kalau ngambik gambar memang tak sedar diri. huhuhuhu...

and on sunday, cekya lelah and got this spining headache! maybe sebab bangun lambat and also makan daging kambing the previous day sebab we had aqiqah for ira as well. adui la! berpusing sungguh! tak ada la makan banyak sangat but effect dia!! huishhh!! remind me not to have daging kambing anymore, ever!

gotta go. ada banyak keje plak ari ni. daaa!

wassalam..

cold friday...

salam....

it's been a tiring week. i had fun at an early dinner with tatot(tot...jom secret recipe ahad nih. huhuhuhuhuh!!!!), and also, ira, ika & mai came last nite. been holding mai sambil henjut-henjut suruh dia tido. aiyoh. once her ibu lift her from my arms, terus cramp both of my hands. agaknya macam tu la punya lenguh tangan kalau dukung baby ek. adeh! cemana nak jadik mak budak nih??

we're having the cukur jambul, insya-Allah esok, around 11am. will be busy tonite. my aunts and the little girls might be sleeping over. my schedule is just full for the weekends. gotta go guys!
have a fun weekend!

wassalam....

p/s : i gave ika her birthday present last nite. it's a ladybird tabung. comel warna merah. she likes it and kept asking all of us for duit syiling. ira even suggested that they stand in front of the house sambil laung,"mari!!!mari!!!letak duit dalam tabung nih!!"..aiseymen!

wonderful, wonderful day!

salam...

it's a bright morning. amazing sunshine. it's cek ika's 4th birthday!


i called her tadi and her mom said she's the first to get up this morning.

cekya : hello..
cek ika : hello auntie sue!!hari ni birthday ika!!
cekya : eh! iyea ke? bukan laaaa....hari nih bukan birthday ika...hari ni birthday auntie sue laaa... (she kept silent for a few second, i guess she was really confused!!hahahaha...)
cek ika : eh iyea la auntie sue!!ibu cakap hari ni birthday ika...!!

hahahah...adeh. she never failed to make me smile and laugh, even if i'm at the lowest mode. happy birthday sayang!

******

and i never, i repeat, never watch miss universe. the whole show and all. i'm only interested with who's the winner. and for 2005, it's miss canada - natalie glebova!

pretty eh?

owh my flu is killing me! nak pi mamam panadol soluble la!
take care guys.wassalam...